Remember the Tinman
by Amela333
Summary: Larten and Arra have a conversation on the train. Companion one-shot to 'The Sixth Path of Destiny'.


**Disclaimer**_**:**_ Nope.

**LOOK HERE BEFORE READING!: **This is a companion fic to _The Sixth Path of Destiny/The Fourth Hunter_. So, if you have not read either of those, this is going to make little or no sense. Of course, you're still welcome to read it anyway ('cause I can't honestly tell you I don't want you to read my story :P), but know that it's going to seem very AU (and probably a little stupid).

**Song:** Remember the Tinman by Tracy Chapman. Beautiful song :) It doesn't completely fit, but the lyric I grabbed does, and it's just a great song!

**A/N: **Gosh was this hard for me to write :P I just could not get them in character, and the first time I wrote it, it was beyond mushy - it was watery! I think it ended up being not too horrible, but you MUST let me know what you think! Even if you hated it :P

And, I was going to post it this weekend to celebrate my first year on here, but I finished it early, and since it's someone's special day (well, tomorrow, but close enough :P)...HAPPY BIRTHDAY ROWAN RAWR! It's now become your birthday present :D

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_And remember the tinman; found he had what he thought he lacked..._

Larten shut the door behind Arra and led the way down the train's rumbling hallway. He felt as though he should say something as they walked, something light and unrelated to what he was supposed to talk to her about, but nothing was coming to mind. He wondered if she felt the same way. But then, she probably wasn't sure why he had asked her to speak with him in private in the first place, and if that was the case, he knew her mind would be spinning. Part of him wanted to reach out for her hand, but he almost feared she would pull away from him. He tried to tell himself that it was a fictitious fear, but he could not shake the image of her fury when Evanna had broken the news out of his head.

When they came upon the empty compartment, he slid the door open and she stepped inside, not sitting but standing just beyond the door, her eyes fixed on him, her face unreadable. He slipped in and shut the door, then found himself standing awkwardly next to her. He quickly sat down on a small bench set cozily between a velvet-covered wall and window. He let out an inaudible sigh of relief when Arra sat next to him without hesitation. He turned sideways to look at her, and she did the same, folding her legs up onto the seat and leaning back so she was facing him.

"Well," Larten sighed, feeling his heart thump a little faster as he looked into her eyes. The grey seemed stormier now than it had ever been. "We have not had much of a chance to talk as of late. I am sorry for that."

"So am I," she said, smiling.

"It seems that we have a lot to talk about these nights," he continued, looking down into his folded hands. "Though, I cannot seem to find where to begin."

She nodded, then let her head relax back against the wall, turning it slightly so she could look out the dark window. He could see the stars in the dark sky reflected in her eyes, making it impossible to read her expression.

"Well," he said, clearing his throat, "I suppose I owe you an apology."

She turned her face towards him again, eyebrows arched slightly.

"You were right, when you said you had a feeling that..." his voice trailed off and he gestured non-specifically at her, almost fearing that being too precise might set her off. "I should have trusted that you would know. I hope you will forgive me."

She shrugged one shoulder. "I understand," she said. "If I were in your place I probably wouldn't have believed me either."

He half-smiled. "It seems like it was not all that long ago that you were young and wished more than anything to have a child. Perhaps I was lost in the assumption that you still secretly wished it." He paused, wondering if he dared ask the question. "I am assuming now that you do not?"

Arra shrunk back into the corner where the seat met the wall, crossing her arms with a sigh. She had expected the question, but had never quite thought up the answer. She wasn't sure herself if she even knew the answer. "For years," she said slowly, "I regretted ever becoming a vampire. I thought I was cursed to a long life of loneliness and unhappiness. It seemed unfair that one who should live so long would have to do so without someone to love; someone who loved them."

He opened his mouth, hurt, wanting to interrupt and say that he loved her, but she held up a hand to stop him.

"I didn't mean it like that," she said. "Of course I knew you loved me, and you know that I love you, but it's not the same. You understand?" When he didn't answer, she sighed, "Maybe you don't know the feeling. You knew what it felt like to be loved by a family, in their own way. I never did. I always felt like there was some part of my heart missing because no one I loved shared a part of me. And of course I love you just as much as I ever would a parent, or a child, but when I was young I always thought that I was not whole. And unfortunately, it seemed permanent.

"So I learned to live with it. I accepted it; bitterly, but I accepted it. That bitterness turned to an adamant refusal to believe it was something I had ever wanted. Then you left," she said it with such an unwaivering tonelessness that it stung him, "and I just fell further into the refusal that I needed anyone."

Arra stopped and looked out the window again, and he watched her with baited breath, waiting for her to continue. When she didn't, he slid nearer to her, lifting her hands into his. "But...?" he said, praying that there would be one.

"I don't know," she sighed. "It's something I need more time to wrap my mind around. When the idea, or, more, premonition, appeared in my head, a little part of me wanted to hold onto the hope, but pushed it away, telling myself it was absurd. Then when I told you, you said the same thing, and I once again did all I could to forget about it. Then we got to Evanna's, and she told us the truth. For so long I'd shunned the whole idea of children, forced any thought of one day having a child out of my mind, and then in an instant, everything changed. I was...furious."

Larten inhaled sharply at the word. He waited, not knowing if she had simply paused to take a breath, or if 'furious' was the final verdict. "So, then," he said, struggling to keep his voice steady, "you wish that none of this had happened. I..." his voice trailed off, "I am sorry, then."

"No, no," Arra shook her head, gently squeezing his hands. "I _was_ furious at the time, but not because of the baby." The fact that she had finally done more than indistinctly refer to it made his heart leap. "I was angry because it seemed unfair that it wasn't a decision that would be ours." She sighed and slowly took one of her hands from his, running her fingers uncertainly through her hair. "Whenever I'd thought of some sort of a miracle happening, I never pictured it like that. Not as some trick of destiny. It wasn't the way I wanted the story to go. But now, the anger has worn off."

"So," Larten began hesitantly, wishing she would stop pausing. "You are no longer angry. But are you...happy about it?"

"Am I happy with all of it? No," Arra answered honestly. "Am I angry about the baby?" He felt his stomach clench as he waited for the answer, but her smile eased his fears. "Of course not."

Larten nodded slowly. "But are you happy about the baby?" 'Happy' was all he'd ever wanted her to be, yet it seemed it was the one emotion she kept out of arm's length.

Arra stared at him for several seconds, wishing he could look inside her and know exactly how she was feeling - it would have been much easier than verbalizing the mix of emotions she had over this whole twist of fate. Finally, she settled on only one word, one which didn't carry every joy or doubt or fear she had, but the one which she felt would best sum them all up. "Yes."

They looked at each other, his emerald eyes meeting her clouded-sky greys, and he let the corners of his mouth pull into a smile. Then he started to laugh, a laugh from deep in his stomach. He wrapped his arms around Arra and kissed the top of her head, laughing into her hair.

"Why are you laughing?" she asked into his chest, though she was beginning to laugh as well. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing is funny," he said, gently pulling back to smile at her, his laughter fading to a low chuckle. "I am just so very relieved. I was so sure that you were angry with me, that you did not want this child - that you would..." his words caught in his throat, his fears sounding stupid now as he revealed them to her, "I feared that you would hate me and the child."

She gave a surprised smile and furrowed her brow, but before she could answer he leaned forward again and silenced her with a kissed, one hand snaking up to the back of her neck, the other gently placed on her back. Then, without thinking, the hand on her back slid around and he rested it on her stomach. Darren had been right; the prospect of being a father made him feel wonderful, and he wanted nothing more than to be somewhat connected with his unborn child. He ran his fingertips gently over the fabric of Arra's shirt, afraid to press too hard. When he could feel only layers of hardened, super-human muscle, he moved his hand around, suddenly panicking - was he failing parenthood before it had even begun?

He hadn't noticed that Arra had broken the kiss and was watching his hand as it manically felt her stomach, a look of amusement on her face. "What are you doing?" she asked finally, placing her hand over his to hold it still.

He looked at her with worried eyes. "I..." he began fretfully, "I cannot feel anything."

She stared at him blankly, then started to laugh again. "Of course you can't," she said. "It didn't just appear there. It has to grow from something very small."

"But, I though that you said..."

"I could feel it here," she tapped a finger to the side of her head, "and here," she lifted his hand with hers and placed it over her heart.

Larten nodded, sighing gratefully at the assurance of not being a horrible father before he had even met his child. He kissed Arra again, then pulled her into his arms.

"And what about you?" she asked after a little while, tilting her head against his chest to look up at him. "How do you feel about it?"

"I?" Larten said, stroking Arra's hair from her face, and she nodded slightly. "Right now, I could not be happier."

They smiled at each other and relaxed back, Arra into his arms, and Larten against the wall. They were silent for several minutes, watching as the night sped by through the train's window, lost in their own thoughts. Finally, Larten was the one to break the quiet. "So," he said, gently tracing a scar on her wrist in a soothing rhythm, "do you think it is a boy or a girl?"

She laughed a little bit. "I don't know. I haven't really given that much thought. It doesn't really matter, does it?"

"No, it does not," he agreed. "I would love either equally. Though, honestly speaking," he lowered his voice to a soft whisper, letting his lips fall right next to Arra's ear, "I am inclined towards a girl, so she can be just as wonderful as you."

He felt, rather than heard, her laugh airily. He gently lifted her chin and bent down to kiss her again.

"I love you," she whispered into his neck.

"And I love you, too." His voice was deep and hushed and sincere.

Neither was yet ready to return to their compartment and the company of their fellow hunters. It had been so long since they had been alone together, and the feeling was so reassuringly familiar that neither could bear the thought of it being over. Though they said nothing to each other, there was an unspoken agreement that they would make the moment last as long as possible.

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And there you have it :) Please, PLEASE review! Thanks for reading!


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